“When the day of Pentecost had come, they were all together in one place. And suddenly from heaven there came a sound like the rush of a violent wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. Divided tongues of fire, appeared among them, and a tongue rested on each of them.”
– Acts 2:1-3
The Christian faith didn’t take off after the Resurrection, something else had to happen first.
Fr. Goodrich preached this sermon online (via Zoom), based on Acts 2:1-21 to a live congregation of St. John’s Episcopal Church, Dubuque, Iowa.
In seekers and skeptics posts, I write specifically for those outside of the Christian faith. I know some will be considering the faith, some will be exploring spiritually, and some will come to any consideration of Christian claims with considerable suspicion. If this describes you at all, I’m glad you’re here. Welcome!
An Apology and a Plea to Those Hurt by and Disillusioned with the Church
Have you been hurt by the Church? Christians have hurt many people. For example, some church leaders violate the high standards of their calling, knowingly using their position to harm others.
There are many other people who have not personally experienced these deep levels of abuse but have, for various reasons, become disillusioned with the Church. For example, the experience of gossip within a congregation can contribute to hurt feelings and disillusionment.
This piece is an inadequate, but sincere attempt to offer an apology and a plea to those of you who have been hurt by the Church or become disillusioned with the Church. I don’t address every sort of situation.
Nor can I address each situation with the depth and dignity they deserve (that your situation deserves). Too often church leaders and church people do not acknowledge these situations unless we are forced to.
3 Ways People Have been Hurt by the Church
1. They were abused by a Christian.
When a family member, a member of the clergy, or a leader in the Church abuses physically, sexually, spiritually, and or emotionally another human being, made in God’s image, a heinous sin has taken place. People carry deep wounds from these incidents. Not only has the abuser inflicted harm.
The abuser has also damaged the victim’s relationship with the Church and often with God. Ordinarily, a person trying to find healing after a difficult incident in their life could look to their faith community and to God for support.
For those abused by Christians, and especially church leaders, this avenue of healing has at best has been comprised, and in many situations has been cut off entirely. For victims, Church often becomes an unsafe place to be avoided. Faith can become a word devoid of any positive meeting.
♥ If you have experienced something like this, I am so sorry. It was wrong what that person or group of people did to you. They violated the teachings of the Christian faith in their actions toward you. You did not deserve it.
♥If there were legal crimes committed against you, those individuals need to be held legally accountable. They also need to be held accountable by the structures of the Church. They have to answer for what they have done.
2. They were let down by a Christian leader.
A pastor who yelled at someone in a meeting. A nun who was cruel. A priest who did not visit a loved one in the care home.
There are also “dramatic” letdowns such as when an admired Christian leader falls in a public way, revealing a “double-life” and a behavior of abuse or financial scandal incompatible with the loving and life-giving ways of Jesus Christ.
♥ If you have been let down by a Christian leader, I am so sorry. In terms of scandals there is no excuse for that kind of behavior and what I wrote above under the “abuse” heading applies here. For the more everyday letdowns, these can be tremendously hurtful.
♥ I am sorry you had to go through that. To have that leader not show up or that leader to behave in the way they did. On behalf of all church leaders, I apologize for the letdown you experienced.
3. They experienced the Church negatively.
This is a broad category. Some people experienced churches that were oppressive, judgmental, and harsh. In these settings, people’s experience of Christian faith was not one of mercy, love, and kindness, but of impossibly high standards, cruel judgment, and fearful demands for conformity.
Alternatively, others experienced the Church negatively by getting involved in its leadership structures, becoming unpleasantly surprised at the pettiness of some church politics.
Fights over the color of the carpet, melodramatic power plays between members of the congregation, and hurtful gossip have also caused some to become disillusioned with the Church. There are also those who have been burned out by the Church.
They gave and gave of themselves in various forms of service, leading ministries and serving on committees but received little support or acknowledgment of their important contributions.
♥ If you grew up in a church that was harsh, I am so sorry. They failed you by their words and actions. I am also sorry if you’ve been put off by church politics,
♥ If you’ve served the church faithfully but were never properly acknowledged for all that you did for others, I’m so sorry.
A Plea to Those Hurt by The Church
My gentle plea to you is to not let what you experienced in the past rob you of the power of faith in your life or the power of having a loving, albeit imperfect, Christian community in your life.
For those of you who have been abused and deeply wounded these words of mine probably seem an impossibility. Based on your experience you have no reason to trust anyone. You are glad not to be involved in the life of Church.
You have no desire to venture there again. I gently want to suggest there is hope for healing and new life for you. God and the people of God can be part of that. Working through your trauma is a personal journey.
A journey greatly aided and often requiring the help of a professional counselor.
Whether your hurt is at these very deep levels or whether your hurt is more simply disillusionment, let me tentatively offer some first steps. These are tentative suggestions. You know your situation better than I.
These steps may lead to a deepening of your faith, a restoring of your faith, and connecting to a supportive, loving, spiritual community. A faith that supports your healing. A faith that opens new doors and new possibilities for your life.
A community that supports you, appreciates you, and walks with you through life’s highs and lows. None of this is something you have to do. You can say no. You can say not yet. These are simply possibilities.
Some of which, I believe, God hopes for you.
Possibilities
♥ Try prayer. Be honest, “God I don’t know if I want to be talking with you” or “Show me your presence.” Pray a prayer that gave you comfort in the past. Pray it more frequently as feels helpful. You may need to think of God differently to move forward. If God as Father is not helpful, approach God as Mother or God as Light or God as Warmth.
God is infinite and many different images help us approach the many aspects of God. Maybe a return to the church or denomination of your past is appropriate. But it may be necessary to move to a new church or a new denomination.
Perhaps a denomination that shares some of your current values. Maybe instead of showing up to a church as a first step, you participate virtually.
♥ Maybe when you muster the courage, you go to a large service where you can be anonymous. Maybe you go to a smaller service, that is less overwhelming with people and noise. Maybe you pray that God will send you a spiritual friend or two in your life. Sometimes the first step toward community is friendship.
Maybe you make a phone or in-person appointment with a pastor or spiritual director to ask your questions and to express your doubts and concerns. Maybe you try reading the Bible. Perhaps you explore Christianity.
Maybe you get an icon of Mary. Perhaps you try following the Christian year at home. When you get involved in serving at at your new church home, set appropriate limits. Practice Sabbath.
May God bless you and guide you. May you find Peace and Joy.
“I have given them your word, and the world has hated them because they do not belong to the world, just as I do not belong to the world. I am not asking you to take them out of the world, but I ask you to protect them from the evil one.”
– John 17:14-15
The real Lord’s Prayer is not the “Our Father.”
Fr. Goodrich preached this sermon based on John 17:6-19 at St. John’s Episcopal Church, Dubuque, Iowa.
When Peter was still speaking, the Holy Spirit fell upon all who heard the word. The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astounded that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles…
– Acts 10:44-45
Sometimes God brings us into contact with the most surprising of people.
Fr. Goodrich preached this sermon based on Acts 10:44-48 at St. John’s Episcopal Church, Dubuque, Iowa.
Julian of Norwich, 14th century anchoress, visionary, and spiritual director is the most well-known figure of the “Golden Age of English Mysticism.” Scholars and theologians debate this notion of a golden age.
They also debate the merits of the mystics associated with it: Julian, Richard Rolle, the anonymous author of the Cloud of Unknowing, Walter Hilton, and sometimes Margery Kempe. In recent years Julian’s popularity has soared.
Sometimes this is attributed to her use of feminine imagery for God. While this has contributed to her fame and been helpful for many, Julian’s gifts to us extend beyond this imagery.
She offers to readers a thoroughly theological, honest, and encouraging picture of God and the spiritual life. Her feast day in the Church of England is May 8.
Julian of Norwich: Life and Writings
Julian was born around 1342 and died around 1429. We know little about her life prior to the record of her visions. Some have speculated that prior to becoming an anchoress, she had been a nun or possibly a married woman.
What we do know is that on May 13, 1373, when she was around 30 years of age, she lay dying. During the course of two days received a series of showings or visions about the crucified Christ.
She recovered and wrote her visions down in a text. This text, titled in an early manuscript, “A vision showed by the goodness of God to a devout woman” has become known as the short text. Over the next twenty years Julian reflected on the meaning of the visions she had seen.
The result was a mature reflection upon them, which is known as the long text. Julian is often credited as being the first woman to write a book in the English language. Translations of the texts (from Medieval Middle English) are often titled, “The Showings of Julian of Norwich” or “The Revelation of Divine Love.”
Julian was an anchoress, meaning she remained “anchored” in one location. Hermits in medieval England, like Richard Rolle, were permitted to travel.
Whether anchorite or hermit the individual’s purpose was the pursuit of the spiritual life and ultimately union with God. In a move starting to modern sensibilities, anchoresses like Julian, symbolically and physically “died” to the ways of the world by being sealed into a set of rooms attached to a church.
Julian’s cell attached to St. Julian’s Church, Norwich, England, has a window on one side to the world. There she offered spiritual counsel to all sorts and conditions of people. There was also an opening on the opposite side to the church.
This enabled her to receive Holy Communion. Anchoresses were permitted to have cats. In iconography, Julian is often pictured with one.
Spiritual Practices and Teaching
Julian’s visions are an extended theological reflection on the Passion, the death and sufferings, of Jesus Christ. The medieval literature scholar Dr. Christiania Whitehead comments:
“Julian’s revelations function as a series of animated snapshots of iconic moments: blood trickling down from the crown of thorns, blood coagulating from the scourge wounds, the drying and discoloration of the face shortly before death.”
– “The Late Fourteenth Century Mystics” in Christian Mysticism
Julian often addresses her readers as “even Christians.” While she may have anticipated a broad audience, Julian is conscious that as an anchoress she is a contemplative.
She has committed herself to a particular way of seeking the Triune God. A way of seeking God principally in deep prayer and meditation. Rather than in seeking God principally in service to others. Julian writes:
“Every man and woman who wishes to live contemplatively needs to know of this, so that it may be pleasing to them to despise as nothing everything created, so as to have the love of uncreated God. For this is the reason why those who deliberately occupy themselves with earthy business, constantly seeking worldly well-being, have not God’s rest in their hearts and souls; for they love and seek their rest in this thing which is so little and in which there is no rest, and do not know God who is almighty, all wise and all good, for he is true rest”
– Short Text, Chapter 4
Finding Our Rest in God
Julian encourages us to find our ultimate rest in God. Whether contemplative or active, we all should heed her warning. Her words echoes these words of Scripture from our Lord Jesus:
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid.”
– John 14:27 (NRSV)
While well known for using feminine language for the divine, Julian was not the first to do so. Earlier spiritual writers such as Anselm of Canterbury, as well as Julian’s near contemporary, the Dominican Meister Eckhart, also made use of this kind of language for God.
However, she explores this understanding of God with greater depth and insight than those before her. She writes:
“Our great God, the supreme wisdom of all things, arrayed and prepared himself to do the service and the office of motherhood in everything. The mother’s service is nearest, readiest, because it is most loving and surest because it is truest.”
– Chapter 60, Long Text
She compares the passion of our Lord with giving birth. For where there is blood in birthing, there is then new life. Julian tells us, with the rest of the Christian Tradition, that from the blood of Jesus came new life for all (Ephesians 1:7).
Julian of Norwich and Christians Today
Evelyn Underhill, a spiritual writer from the last century, says of Julian:
“As the first real English woman of letters, she has a special interest for us; the more so when we consider the beauty of character, depth of thought, and poetic feeling which her one book displays. In her mingled homeliness and philosophical instinct, her passion for Nature, her profound devotion to the Holy Name, she presents the best elements of English mysticism.”
– The Mystics of the Church
Julian offers Christians today language for God and the spiritual life that is maternal and distinctively feminine.
This gives us permission to approach God as Mother and Father. This will be liberating for some, complimentary for others, and difficult for some. This language can open new doors for our intimacy with God.
Julian’s relationship with God is personal, intimate, and conversational. She does not hesitate to voice her struggles. Her struggles with sin or with making sense of her experience of God and the teachings of the Church.
Throughout the showings she experiences a tension between her experience of the love of God and the Church’s teachings on hell and judgment. She does not choose one or the other but holds to her experience and to the Church’s teachings.
She tells us:
“But Jesus who in this vision informed me of all that is needed by me, answered with these words and said: ‘It was necessary that there should be sin; but all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.”
– Long Text, Chapter 27
Neither God nor Julian resolves the tensions between the realities of sin and judgment and those of grace and love.
What Julian does is hold to both. Wise counsel for all of us, whatever our struggles or doubts, while trusting in God “that all shall be well.”
